Review: Waking Gods (Themis Files #2)

4 stars. I'm trying so, so super hard to stick to my goal of finishing series/catching up on things and look! Doing it! Loving it! Honestly I don't know how well I'll be able to recall this book, because shit has really hit the fan recently in terms of life stuff, but I have to say, it was such a relief to read about alien robots every time I picked it up. Part of me wonders if I’ll remember it even more vividly because of that. Either way, I can't wait to read the final one and find out what happens.

Waking Gods picks up where Sleeping Giants left off and then immediately broadens its scope to ... well, global. Universal. Robots similar to Themis appear all over the planet and, well, they don't exactly come in peace. Dr. Rose Franklin, robot pilots Kara and Vincent, our unnamed friend, a few other familiar faces plus some refreshing new ones work together to try to save the world facing incredible stakes and unexpected threats.

I will say this - these books are totally unafraid to really go there. The death and destruction in this book occurs on an insanely widespread scale. And also a personal one. I don't think it's a spoiler when I say that not everyone survives this particular battle for humanity (what like there's only one?). It's good stuff.

A couple of questions: the solution that ended up "defeating" the robots was... well, what the fuck was that? Still not exactly sure where that came from, but it was obviously a kind of clumsy way of setting up the cliffhanger at the end of the book. Also, bringing back Ryan was a little unnecessary. Also, I get that this is kind of a pitfall, or maybe an expected hurdle for readers to jump over when it comes to epistolary novels, but wow some of these characters are really long-winded LOL. It's cool. It's an easy book to skim.

Okay I have a massive headache, so I'm out of here, but I really recommend this series for fans of science fiction. It's an interesting spin on a classic story told in a unique, compelling format.

Waking Gods on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: Nine Perfect Strangers

4 stars. The basics: told in multiple POVs, Nine Perfect Strangers follows nine folks - of various backgrounds, ages, professions and idiosyncrasies - when they check into a health spa for a 10-day retreat. Nothing seems out of the ordinary, but the spa's leader, Masha, is a bit mysterious and odd. Things get weird when she reveals that they will all be subjected to a new method of transformational therapy - a "new protocol" ... one that could potentially do more harm than good.

This is going to sound kind of harsh, and I don't mean it to: the characters in this book are really messy. And I don't mean messy as in a trait, I mean messily-written. All of them are all over the place. Frances gave me actual whiplash. Characters can be complex, multifaceted, hypocritical, confused, hormonal - they can have conflicting motivations. But these particular characters lacked strong cores. I truly didn't understand any of them, and frankly wasn't quite sure why some of them even existed... looking at you, Lars!

But, importantly, I rooted for them all the same. Nine Perfect Strangers earns a lot of points for premise, short chapters, old-fashioned charm, and some truly spectacular moments. It's compelling and fun and worth a read IMO. The way Moriarty ties in weight loss - so often it's practically a theme - is brilliant (if not a little too much like being inside my own head all day every day). She's razor sharp about that sort of thing, and also very witty. I like that she explores the concept of "health" and self-improvement through each perspective; our reliance on technology; our varying ideas of perfection; our traumas; our inability to process trauma; our inability to communicate and connect honestly with others...

Anyway, this is a particular type of book for a particular type of reader. It's superficial at times but also carries a lot of emotional depth (please check TWs). It’s entertaining and a fast read. I enjoyed it and will definitely check out the adaptation. Absolutely loved the ending. Honestly every star was earned during one particularly perfect use of corporate speak. I gasped.

Nine Perfect Strangers on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: Dark Histories: Season Four

5 stars. So awesome. Entertaining, varied, full of the detail-rich writing I'm looking for. I'm such a fan. Favorites: The Chocolate Cream Killer, Alexander Pearce, and the one about Nandor Fodor and the poltergeist. Just like the show's tagline says: the facts are stranger than fiction. The Cardiff Giant was also an extremely hilarious one - I looked it up... pictures exist, and they are fantastic. I hope Ben publishes more of these, in the meantime, I'm lucky to have the podcast.

Dark Histories: Season Four on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review; Danse Macabre

5 stars. I'd recommend this for King fans and horror fans and horror writers... anyone who enjoys reading about horror as much as they enjoy reading the genre itself. King's (delightfully) recognizable voice has been such a comfort during these strange times. In this extraordinary piece of nonfiction, he presents an overview of the horror genre from the 1950s through the 1980s, exploring its origins, mediums, archetypes and all stars. It's an outdated chronicle that I highlighted the shit out of, because I'm an obsessive and I find that this sort of thing charges my batteries. Brain food.

I want to touch on the outdated part - not because it took away from my reading experience, only that it made me thirsty for more. Dear Santa, the only thing I want for Christmas this year is for Stephen King to write a Part II about my last thirty years. Let's talk podcasts, found footage, and creepypastas. Let's talk about the internet, and fan fiction, and STREAMING. I would kill to read this.

Not everything is outdated, though. Many of his theories about why horror is produced and consumed ring true today. Maybe even moreso, today. It was incredibly interesting to read him argue that horror on television never truly took off because it could never be scarier than the news. The way he identifies and characterizes economical horror (using a scene from Amityville Horror as a brilliant example) made me think of, well, Squid Game. There's a reason why that show hit #1 when it did. And the way he describes feeling a sort of maniacal glee destroying the world when he wrote The Stand. Why do you think I read it in mid-2020?

Another idea that stood out to me: "that disbelief is not like a balloon, which may be suspended in air with a minimum of effort; it is like a lead weight, which has to be hoisted with a clean and a jerk and held up by main force. Disbelief isn't light; it's heavy." Only notable because I have had two recent conversations with folks who stay away from fantasy, science fiction and horror because "it isn't real." Devastating, if you ask me.

King is the best, but he's also an expert. As much as he hates on overanalysis and the so-called "critical reading" certain college professors employ (wringing a story dry, essentially), he offers a lot of fantastic writing on the classics. Some of which I agreed with, some of which I did not. But he really, really knows his shit, and I learned so much. I have a long list of books to read and movies to see... I clearly know my way around maybe just one corner of this world. I'm eager for more.

Danse Macabre on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: Nothing But Blackened Teeth

Quick status update: I decided at the very, very last minute that 2022 is going to be all about catching up on books that I have or have around but haven't read yet. I desperately need to clear out my KU and my library shelves and also like 100+ books I own - both physically and digitally - that are unread. So far, so good... I'm down to 3 on KU and 2 loans from the library. We'll see if I can keep it up. I'm still on my neverending quest to catch up on series that I started, so that'll be a priority as well. Otherwise I'm going easy on myself this year. Just living is challenging enough.

On to my review...

4 stars. I went in with really high hopes for this, kinda skimmed my way through it dejectedly, but then it ended with a bang that I loved and that shot my rating way up? Not sure that's ever happened before, but here we are. I absolutely adore horror novellas, and Japanese folklore, so this was right up my alley... despite some tortured writing and try-hard vibes.

Nothing But Blackened Teeth features a gathering of old friends, tangled romantic histories very present and very alive, in an ancient mansion so two of them can get married. Immediately it's clear that this web of friendships is unhealthy and tense, which sets things up perfectly for a little supernatural intervention. Okay, a lot of supernatural intervention. Things get crazy fast. Horror is inevitable. Tragedy is inevitable.

The unfurling of this plot is dragged down a bit by prose absolutely dripping - sopping wet - with metaphors (see what I did there?). But it's lightened by the occasional self-aware/meta comment by a character, and by what's left unsaid, which is a whole damn lot. A full-length version of this story might've been a lot of things: scarier, more intimate, less confusing. But the short length crisps up nicely and lets us as readers be smart enough to draw our own conclusions.

The imagery is on point if not a little repetitive, though what stands out to me is the ending. It's so difficult, maybe almost impossible, to land perfectly with horror... but the final pages of NBBT left me relieved, satisfied, and unsettled (in a good way) all at once. Not to sound too much like a weird neighbor or a toxic boss, but I'll be keeping an eye on Cassandra Khaw. This book is badass.

Nothing But Blackened Teeth on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: Between Two Fires

5 stars... the easiest 5 star rating I've ever awarded. I highly, highly recommend this exquisite book of religious, medieval horror. Wow. My high expectations were absolutely blown to smithereens. I wish I had read this in school because the urge to dive into these words and do the whole analysis/dissection/discussion thing is very strong.

Between Two Fires takes place in mid-1300s France; the Plague Years. Thomas, a disgraced knight who has fallen into thievery with a group of brigands, encounters a young girl in a Norman village. She is alone and innocent and he feels, almost inexplicably, protective of her. But then she starts spouting religious lore and prophecies, and seems to know things - and possess skills that she shouldn't. Despite his questions, Thomas follows the girl on a sort of pilgrimage for the sake of his soul and for the sake of the world.

While I could definitely argue that this book hit me so right because it checks a lot of personally-interesting boxes (medieval horror, religious horror, plague stuff, disturbing monsters, found family), I would also say that it is simply on its face a tremendous and successful story. There is lightness and humor and hope written in ways that don't seem cheesy... these elements just add to the fullness and richness of the narrative arc. And the details! Christopher Buehlman really knows what he's talking about. The world he drops us into is immersive and vivid.

I don't usually gush over characters (I read a review on this godforsaken website recently in which the reviewer wished a certain male hero would "slap her ass like a drum"), but I really, really love Thomas, Matthieu and Delphine. They are as admirable as they are askew, and lovable in that I know you are doomed sort of way. Thomas especially ... oof. Not saying he could slap my ass, but I'd love to give him a hug, lol.

I can't go without mentioning that I happen to be a non-religious person who really enjoys religious stories, especially religious horror. I mean look - an epic battle between heaven and hell over the souls of earth? That just makes for a damn good story. It's good vs evil, a classic, and it simmers with fun, disturbing possibilities. But there is a quality to the war as it is depicted in this book that is especially heartwrenching and gorgeous. I studied art history in school, and I swear I could see the angels and demons fighting like in the paintings I've memorized.

My first read of 2022 and I already know it'll be on my Top 5 list for the year. I can't wait to read it again - was tempted to turn back to page 1 the second I finished it. Phew. Again: wow. This is so my fucking cup of tea. More, please? How about a Between Three Fires, just for the fun of it?

Between Two Fires on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

2021 in Reading

— Y E A R I N R E V I E W —

Well, here we are. 2021: the year I discovered booktok, BBQ ranch dressing and Below Deck. On to the books:

Classic and Lovely: Something Wicked This Way Comes
Subtle, Scary, Satisfying: The Book of Accidents
The Main Character did WHAT: American Psycho
Plot Twist Party: The Survivors
Stranger Than Fiction: The Cold Vanish
Fuck Yeah Feminism: Matrix for real soothed my soul
Biggest Disappointment: Empire of the Vampire
Best Discovery: A Dead Djinn in Cairo
Biggest Mindfuck: The Death of Jane Lawrence
Most Satisfying Reread: The City of Brass
Tried Too Hard: Plain Bad Heroines
Quintessentially Kelly: Dark Histories
No Regrets: Pet Semetary

TOP 5:

5) All Things Cease to Appear by Elizabeth Brundage is in fifth place because it’s not something I’d typically read, but I picked it up in anticipation of the adaptation (which was barf). And it REALLY surprised me in a good way. It’s human and sad and thrilling.

4) The Only Good Indians by Stephen Graham Jones… oof. The year I discovered SGJ. I immediately bought this so my husband could enjoy it as well. You’re not hardcore unless you live hardcore and read this incredible piece of rock and roll horror with a bite and a sting.

3) The North Water by Ian McGuire could’ve won the Quintessentially Kelly award, because it’s so up my fucked up little alley: cold weather, man vs beast, man vs man. Loved it, loved the TV show.

2) Razorblade Tears by S.A. Cosby is a great, thought-provoking book that I had to include because I was so electrified, and so in awe. From my review: “It is written with deep understanding, sensitivity and respect for circumstances and context and for multifaceted characters who simmer with contradiction and hypocrisy, even sometimes with self-awareness. And with the capacity for growth.”

1) The Last House on Needless Street by Catriona Ward. WHAT ON EARTH, more horror like this please. My heart was in my fucking throat. There’s something about the combo of … darkly disturbing and hilarious that gets me every time. Team Olivia.

READING CHALLENGE:

Nope, didn’t do it. I’m gonna go easy on myself, but I’ve got big plans for 2022.

HAPPY NEW YEAR, or whatever the hell we’re saying this time.

Review: The Lost Village

4 stars. This is pretty much a perfect thriller, or at least, perfectly suited to my reading interests (Scandinavian, well-paced, super dark and super spooky). It reminded me of an elevated slasher - cinematic in tone but sophisticated in premise, execution and resolution.

The Lost Village is about a group of five filmmakers who travel to an isolated ghost town in remote Sweden to make a documentary about an old mystery: in 1959, the murdered, mutilated body of a resident was found in the center square, and all other residents of the town had disappeared. Alice, whose grandmother's family vanished along with the rest, is determined to trace her way from the past to the present and find some answers along the way. Narration alternates between the present and the past... throwing that out there because I know flashbacks are an annoyance for some readers.

I'll say upfront that I docked a star because I absolutely could not stand the protagonist (being inside her head made me itch), but I wonder if the author intentionally made her a little naive/prickly/selfish because she's more realistic that way... insecurities battling headstrong determination at every turn. I can relate to that. Something about her just didn't quite click, though. I suppose she acted when it mattered, in the end.

Beyond that, I completely admire the author's presentation of mental illness. We owe mentally ill women especially patience, time, and comprehensive, accessible care, even in fictional worlds that are often dominated by men, or by inappropriate villainizing. It's a shame that such a stigma still exists around something that causes so many so much suffering, and we should reckon with the past by doing better in the future. I'll look to authors like this for hope when I feel like I'm screaming into the void.

LOVED the atmosphere. LOVED the creepy moments and the dread - this felt full-on horror during certain moments. A story like this must go horribly wrong for the characters at some point, and the author really went there, painfully. I could barely put this down except when I needed a breather. LOVED the ending.

The Lost Village on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: The Last House on Needless Street

5 stars. WHAT IN THE EVERLOVING MOTHERFUCKING MESSED UP MEMORY PALACE DID I JUST READ?! I could only DREAM of developing a story like this, let alone WRITING IT and WRITING IT PERFECTLY. I am all heart-eyes after that sublime, scary, sad, spectacular reading experience. HIGHLY recommend, and highly recommend going in as blind as possible. Normally I don't care about spoilers, but this time: AVOID THEM.

At the beginning of The Last House on Needless Street we meet Ted. Ted is struggling to keep it together in order to care for his daughter, as well as his cat Olivia. He drinks too much, can't keep a job and suffers from mysterious gaps in his memory. We know immediately that something is wrong in Ted's world, but the truth isn't revealed until we've bobbed and weaved through the twists and turns of his mental landscape. And it is a fascinating journey.

For a book that tackles such dark subjects - abuse and murder, in all their horriflying shapes and sizes - it's really, really funny. Olivia serves as a hilarious narrator with all her cat-titude and superiority. Even Ted has his moments of wry irony and... dare I say it, adorable self-awareness? The depictions of mental illness, addiction, even criminal behavior were done with astute understanding and even compassion. It all works together, in the end, like one of Ted’s ridiculous recipes.

But I can't go without praising, beyond the brilliance of the premise, the brilliance of the plotting. This is, without a doubt, one of the most perfectly paced, perfectly plotted books I've ever read. I saw nothing coming and loved it. The layers are revealed almost lovingly, and they all made perfect sense in the big picture. Nothing felt cheap or too far or too convenient. This book demands a re-read, which I may do almost immediately, because I want to bask in the awareness of what the clues mean this time.

When you read a lot of horror like me, you tend to recognize the landscape. I'm so happy to report that this book took me somewhere entirely new. I'm excited to see what comes from Catriona Ward next. (Can we talk about the US cover though? Not exactly... the choice that I would've made. Don't judge this book by that cover.)

TEAM OLIVIA.

The Last House on Needless Street on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: Chasing the Boogeyman

3 stars. Interesting! I'm not sure I would call this horror, exactly, or even a thriller... it's more like a uniquely formatted memoir/mystery. I've never read anything by Richard Chizmar before, but 10 pages in I was like ... okay, this guy loves Stephen King. And Ray Bradbury. Sure enough, he references and admires both loudly. I think that's awesome, and those authors are the absolute masters, but I wish horror authors would channel someone else every now and then, lol. It was just so obvious.

Chasing the Boogeyman is a fictional story written as though it is a new edition of a non-fiction true crime book "originally published" in the 90s about a series of murders that "take place" n the 80s. The setting, and even some of the characters, are real. The killings/circumstances are not, but that doesn't matter. It's still a strong narrative and a real pageturner. I read it in one day. Think I'll Be Gone in the Dark.

Unfortunately this didn't... really meet my expectations. It read like a slightly more elevated creepypasta, like something you'd find on r/nosleep, which isn't a bad thing, it just didn't blow me out of the water. I can't relate to the deep nostalgia Richard Chizmar felt for his childhood and adolescence, not just because I didn't grow up in a small town, but because I wasn't as, well, privileged. Bradbury admittedly looks back at the 50s with rose-tinted glasses, but at least he chose to express a profound sense of humility and gratitude over a sort of feaux-aw shucks attitude and melodramatic posturing about growing up.

Eesh, that sounds really harsh. I'm sorry! This is one of the highest rated horror books of the year, and probably deserves it for the creativity of the premise alone. The chapters about the murders were well-written - although I PICKED OUT THE KILLER ALMOST IMMEDIATELY! Why does my brain do that! I was so bummed when I found out I had been right ... I was really hoping for a better twist.

I'd better stop before I complain this into oblivion. Listen, I recommend it. I liked it! I'd like to read more by Chizmar. It's perfect for fans of King and Bradbury and true crime books. It has clever moments. I loved the pictures, as staged as they looked haha. The blending of the real and the fictional is very well done. It just didn't ... you know, thrill me.

Chasing the Boogeyman on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads