Review: The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein

4 stars. Positively delightful! A deliciously dark take on the classic Frankenstein with the right amount of themes and layers - but not too many to weigh down the sheer fun of it all. This book is written from the perspective of Elizabeth Frankenstein, Victor's childhood companion and eventual wife, who plays a twisted and fascinating role in his pursuits - and his successes. The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein is the perfect title for something like this, something unexpected and topsy-turvy and atmospheric. 

This is my first by Kiersten White and I have to say I'm impressed. She peppers the horror and the action with admirable claims about gender, power, relationships, and more. Victor is a classic villain (not a spoiler!) - one we can love to play the game with. He's hateful, of course, but well-written and has a satisfying arc. 

I also loved the tone: this is not historical fiction meant for extensive research or detail, but for thunderstorms and dusty bookstores and ice shacks over lakes. And our heroine wrestles with choice and mistakes and guilt and blindness and ignorance and awareness with astounding maturity and hope. I loved the idea that guilt and blame are distinct and that under certain circumstances, one can technically be blamed but should not feel guilt. 

If I had one complaint, I'd say that the ending - as scrumptious as it was - seemed a bit abrupt! I would've loved to see a bit of a longer conclusion, maybe a post-epilogue epilogue, because I had grown to love the featured characters and wasn't convinced that the end was truly the end (always shoot twice, as they say). Otherwise, an excellent book for reading by the crackling fireplace on a cold, rainy day. 

The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: Time to Smell the Roses (The Hermux Tantamoq Adventures #4)

5 stars. *sniffle* Man, I'm really going to miss these characters. Hermux, thanks for the adventures, the laughs, the memories and the snacks. (These books ALWAYS make me hungry - the food is cheesy and quaint and so delicious-sounding!) This one wraps up nicely, just like the first three, with a satisfying crack that reminds me of reading Nancy Drew and Sammy Keyes as a kid. 

Hermux, Terfle and Linka are at last ready to start their new lives together when a Mystery Appears! This one involves a murder, perfume, competitive business rivals, and a few deep family secrets. It's scandalous, twisted, tangled, and of course Tucka's right in the middle of it all. Expect a lot of clever rose puns, bee stings and new friends :)

I do enjoy that each of these books features a "theme" - art, history, the theater - although this was probably my least favorite. But I loved the story. There are breathtaking action sequences along with some really heartwarming moments. I'm so bummed the books haven't continued - I would've loved to hear what sort of doughnuts were served at the Tantamoq/Perflinger wedding. 

This is a random detail, but I really enjoy - beyond just her nature and narrative presence - how everyone else treats Hermux's pet. It's a sign that a character is "good" when he or she treats Terfle with respect, and a sign that a character is "bad," or villainous, when Terfle is ignored. There are many lessons embedded in these pages, and this to me is one of the most charming and important.

Sigh. I just love these cozy, nostalgic, amusing mysteries. 

Time to Smell the Roses on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: No Time Like Show Time (The Hermux Tantamoq Adventures #3)

5 stars. Precious in the best way. I know that the Hermux Tantamoq Adventures were popular upon publication, I have no idea why they didn't stay popular beyond that. To me they are up there with Roald Dahl, Eva Ibbotson, the Redwall books... they're wonderfully clever and entertaining.

This, the third book in the series, takes Hermux and his charming pet Terfle to the theater. We meet old favorites, like Linka, new heroes, like Hermux's hilarious best friend Nip, and vicious villains with multiple identities and evil plans! It's all very charming - a solid mystery, characters you can root for, and even a little bit of romance...

I've been reading a lot lately about mythic folklore and children's literature, and talking animals, shockingly, comes up quite a lot. Beyond the analytical and psychological reasons, for me personally it's just very comforting to take a break from humans. The lessons in these books are just as clear without us. 

And lessons there are many - good ones, too! Michael Hoeye always injects classic good vs evil themes and his hero shows true bravery, honor, loyalty and courage. Hermux always does the right thing, and he is rewarded for it. And of course there's Tucka, who is literally the most Extra before Extra was a thing. Love her. 

I had the fourth book marked as read, but I don't actually think that's true - I have no memory of reading it and had to buy it used recently. I look forward to finishing (mourning) the series and - recognizing it's one of the least-known in children's literature right now? - my reviews will go totally unnoticed. But that's okay. That's not the point.

Team Pinchester for life. 

No Time Like Show Time on: Amazon | Bookshop.org | Goodreads

Review: Obisidio (The Illuminae Files #3)

4 stars. Phew, what a wild ride. These books are really great - really impressive. It's clear a ton of effort went into the storytelling and the graphics and worldbuilding, and honestly, it all just comes across as really fucking entertaining. I'll be honest, I was tempted to skim through the climax (you know, just to zoom past all the pesky complications and fake-out deaths) but I stuck with it and it was really worth it. I'm a little sad it's over, for all my bitching and complaining about how challenging it is for me to finish a series.

Obsidio picks up immediately where Gemina left off - with a raggedy band of teen heroes attempting to take down Evil Corp and save lives and get laid. Heimdall has been destroyed, survivors are cramped on the Mao, and the only viable means of jump transportation leads them back to where it all began, Kerenza, where BeiTech is trying to wrap things up and return to the office, so to speak. All the favorites are still in play, including AIDAN, who I definitely do NOT dream about at night because he is definitely NOT my new favorite character of ALL time. 

Look, this shit is just fun - and, as I noted in my review of Illuminae, deep. We have space battles and wormholes and AI and we also have explorations of good vs evil, morality, ethics, war, death, identity, grief, existence, etc. I found the juxtaposition really jarring in the first book (I think that's probably because my expectations were off ... I judged! And was wrong for it!) but learned to love it here. This stuff makes you think. Maybe I learned a lesson, or two. 

If I had any quibbles, it would be that this one didn't need so many subplots. And also the romances annoyed me, but that's because I'm ice cold and also because I was nowhere NEAR as cool or smart or emotionally mature or monogamous as these teenagers. So I found the whole love thing a little ... ridiculous. And unnecessary? 

But honestly, good stuff. I'm officially interested in checking out more from Kaufman and Kristoff, if not a little frightened of what is apparently a very passionate fanbase? Nah, I'm excited. Onward. AIDAN, call me. 

Obsidio on: Amazon | Goodreads

Review: Gemina (The Illuminae Files #2)

4 stars. Can I get some ass slaps and high fives for making my way through a YA series like a champ? Slowly, I know, but still. Illuminae completely confused me - I literally thought it was so dumb and so spectacular at the same time. Can a book be both? Yes, apparently, because I feel the same way about Gemina. 

Oh man. So visually stunning. So twisty and turny. So utterly breathtaking. So fucking impossible to read on a Kindle. So shockingly annoying. Seriously - the romance, oh man. So annoying. It grates. It burns. It maybe even melted my ice cold heart, maybe just a little. But still. How can a work inspire so much appreciation and so much eye rolling simultaneously? Should we ask True Blood?

Also, where were all these cute, emotionally available, commitment-ready boys when I was a teenager? Hmm?

Gemina picks up where Illuminae left off. After attacking Kerenza, Evil Corp sends Bad Guys to the wormhole where the survivors are headed, and once again the fate of the world - ahem - lands in the laps of several obnoxious, love struck teenagers. Yes folks, we’ve got wisecracks. We’ve got underage geniuses. We’ve got romantic melodrama! We’ve even got disgusting drug monsters to replace zombies.

I know I sound critical, which I am, sort of. But somehow all of these “lame” tropes mix together to make some sort of engaging book magic. *shrugs* who knows? Am I feeling generous? Am I feeling desperate due to strange reading times? What’s happening?! 

The sci-fi elements here are truly entertaining, if not totally incomprehensible and therefore not really necessary to enjoy the plot. Bring on the quantum entanglements. And AIDAN, oh AIDAN!! My fave. This book puts out a refreshing take on an old trope: AI that knows its power but not its place.

Anyway, can’t wait to knock out the third and continue FINISHING THINGS TO COMPLETION. Series, I mean. Books. It’s not what you think. I've had three White Claws and I'm about to have three more. 

Gemina on: Amazon | Goodreads

Review: Abarat: Absolute Midnight (Abarat #3)

(No Rating.) Okay. I went in prepared. I did my research, I looked at reviews, I knew what to expect. But can we put all that aside for one tiny second and celebrate because I DID IT! I read it, I finished what's available, I completed what I started. Phew, I'm good for something after all (I joke. I'm good for nothing. I'm utterly useless during these weird times and also during normal times.). But I can finally cross a series (incomplete though it is) off my list and say that I'm banging along my 2020 reading challenge. Yay.

For reference - my review of Abarat and of Abarat: Days of Magic, Nights of War. For those too lazy to click - they are glowing, rave reviews of what I considered to be one of the most creative, imaginative, vivid, mindblowing fantasy series of all time. So there's some context for you: these books are super important to me and and actually quite beloved in terms of reading memories from my younger days.

On to the book. I don’t think I can summarize without spoilers bleeding through, but let’s just say: Mater Motley’s evil plan is revealed and executed to devastating results. Candy and her friends attempt to navigate the catastrophe while she sorts through the mess that is her very identity/sense of self. Abarat is, well, changed forever. It's not like he didn't warn us. The first two books are full of warnings and foreshadowing about nightmares to come. 

"There was worse to come, much worse. Whatever the fear-flooded mind might have imagined when it thought of Midnight - the unholy rituals performed there in the name of Chaos and Cruelty, the blank-eyed brutalities that took the sanity or the lives of any innocent who ventured there; the stink out of its gaping graves, and the dead who had climbed from them, raised for mischief's sake, and left to wander where they would - all this was just the first line in a great book of terror that the two powers who had once ruled Gorgossium, Christopher Carrion and his grandmother, Mater Motley, had begun to write."

About a hundred pages in, in the middle of a certain fight/chase scene, I sat back, closed the book and sort of went phew, how did we end up here?! Yup, the gloves came off, the claws came out and Clive Barker really let things run wild. And you know what? I kind of enjoyed it.

Okay, so this book starts with one of the weirdest rug pulls I've ever experienced. I kind of LIKED THAT! 

Okay, so the plot train went careening off the rails and into the Lovecraftian abyss. Almost literally. BRING IT ON! 

Okay, so the feel-good fairy tale turned out to be a lot darker, and weirder. SO WHAT? MOST OF THEM ARE!

Okay, so from a technical perspective the tone was REALLY different and the writing felt like a bad Jackson Pollack painting - borderline nonsensical at times - and the characters were not themselves and there were a lot of wait what moments that felt sloppy and forced (like a certain love story). I still couldn't put it down!

I've decided not to give this book a star rating because I'm pretty sure it doesn't exist in a universe where that would even be relevant. Read this fever dream if you dare. 

Abarat: Absolute Midnight on: Amazon | Goodreads

Review: Abarat: Days of Magic, Nights of War (Abarat #2)

5 stars. Happy/melancholy sigh. I wish I could jump into a glorious ocean and leave Chickentown-I-mean-Earth forever for a magical land full of colorful creatures and vivid wonders and honorable people and layered villains (lol). I wish I could start fresh with a found family of loyal friends and fierce warriors and lovely souls. Luckily, the second book in Clive Baker’s Abarat series, Days of Magic, Nights of War, beautifully offers that opportunity in a truly exciting sequel to the first.

Candy Quackenbush is busy exploring her new home with her best friend Malingo when it becomes horribly apparent she’s being hunted. Christopher Carrion, the Lord of Midnight, has plans for her - mysterious, dangerous plans. When she daringly escapes from his clutches by using magic, her new friends (and her enemies) begin to wonder if they’ve seen this girl before - and if she has a deeper purpose in coming to their land.

While the plot here is again a vehicle for the worldbuilding (which I didn’t mind in the first book and I don’t mind here), this book to me is BIGGER and WIDER and WILDER and DEEPER. It’s truly exciting and full of sequences that left me breathless. Abarat is so FULL and I couldn’t get enough. The stories, the myths, the dreams, the monsters, the beautiful illustrations merge into what is a truly captivating reading Experience-uppercase-E.

Also like in the first book, Barker circles some fascinating Big Themes, like morality and character and victimhood and intent and loyalty and abuse and cycles of abuse and most painfully/beautifully, love. I’m not normally one for love (or sentimentality of any kind lol), but I love his messages here. Love is love is love is love and it’s worth fighting for. Hate is hate is hate is hate and it can be super complicated, actually.

And there’s fun stuff too, like carnivals! And a battle! With ships! And dragons!

I wish these books had gained the notoriety/audience/longevity of other fantasy series from the 2000’s, as I truly believe they’d speak to readers of all ages, types and sizes. I guess they’ll just be iconic in my own mind, like my reviews ;) Anyway, onto the third - which I’ve never finished - and then I’ll cry big fat tears because the goddess Izabella will never take me away...

Abarat: Days of Magic, Nights of War on: Amazon | Goodreads

Review: Wet Magic

5 stars. Well, I keep looking for a palette cleanser. Although instead of a bad taste, I want to scrub away reality. And the palette is in fact my anxious, exhausted brain. I keep looking for books that will, like, move me physically from this space to another. Books that will wash everything away.

Edith Nesbit did that for me so much when I was a kid, so I sort of had the idea to return to something reliable rather than try something new? And it sort of worked. I love her witty writing and clever characters. I adore the worlds she builds and her approach to writing about magic and the occasional meta details about stories and fairy tales. I love her ability to craft delightful, utter nonsense.

This one was always my favorite - a story about four children (and a tagalong friend) who rescue a captured mermaid. They are taken to her underwater kingdom and accidentally start a war with other oceanic creatures, which is a lot more delightful and a lot less scary than it sounds. I loved this one when I was a kid because I loved the sea and always secretly hoped I was actually a mermaid and would return home one day, like the well-adjusted super-reader that I was. 

Here's the thing: it didn't really hold up to my adult eyes. I still love it, and always will, but I enjoyed it more now from the perspective of: oh wow, she didn't just write tropes - she developed them. She originated them. Instead of feeling the pull of escape the way I did as a kid, I felt appreciation for her craft and for the influence she had on the fantasy genre. Which is not to say it was a bad reading experience, or a disappointment (not at all!), it was simply different and unexpected.

So, I'll keep looking. I'll poke around Dahl and Eager and Ibbotson and Keene and Hoeye and see if I can find a doorway that'll open enough for me to escape my current reality. Wish me luck. But ALSO - I do recommend this, especially for little ones, especially to be read aloud at bedtime, maybe on a trip to the beach. Don't forget to bring shiny pails and shovels and maybe, as the sun sets over a glistening expanse of ocean blue, you can whisper, just to see... "Sabrina fair..."

Wet Magic on: Amazon | Goodreads

Review: Abarat (Abarat #1)

5 stars. Every couple of years, I crave these books. I get nostalgic for the pure and colorful escape, for the deftly-named characters and the creative world-building. I get excited to travel to new places and meet old friends and face clever, layered villains. I get eager to pour over the brilliant and vivid illustrations, to dive into a true reading Experience-uppercase-E.

But here's the thing: for as many times as I've read and re-read the first book, I've never made it through the third. ACK. I know that Clive Barker intended this to be a quintet, but we've settled for three, and I can't even finish them all! My vague reading challenge for 2020 was to finish what I start (meaning: series) and I totally burnt out on The Expanse by Book 5. So here we are. Should I try to get something right for once? Should I actually cross something off the list?

CANDY QUACKENBUSH. A girl from Chickentown, Minnesota who finds herself in Abarat, a magical land - archipelago, actually - where each island occupies a single hour of the day. Candy meets creatures and monsters and animals beyond her wildest dreams - but something feels off. She's being hunted by Christopher Carrion, the Lord of Midnight, whose interest in her borders on obsession. And as she immerses herself more in Abaratian ways, it all starts to feel ... familiar.

Tasty stuff.

Beyond the basic story (which is essentially just a vehicle for the world-building, which I don't mind at all?), I love the lessons here: Candy's an admirable Alice with a fantastic attitude. She demonstrates compassion and empathy and characters who don't are heartily and happily called out. There's exploration of fate and destiny and bravery and surrender. It's fantastic.

I recall very fondly going online (a slow, loud thing when I was a child in the 90s) and pouring over the Extremely Sophisticated Online Flash Animation on the website for these books. I believe there was an interactive map of The Beautiful Moment, fan art, and more. I painstakingly copied the illustrations with my colored pencils, I even tried to write my own pseudo-fanfiction-y version of the story in a pink spiral notebook involving a protagonist named Kandi and several fierce old women ... lol. 

But enough embarrassing shit about me. My point is just to say that these books are/were formative and foundational and special to me.

Fans of fantasy: read this. Fans of world-building: read this. Fans of art: read this. Fans of myths: read this. Fans of fun, creative villains: read this. These books make me fucking emotional, and not just because they offered so much comfort and so much inspiration when I was a kid. This series holds up as something truly unique - something beautiful - something with the potential to be important for generations to come. REMEMBER ABARAT, book world. Let's return together.

Abarat on: Amazon | Goodreads

Review: The Ten Thousand Doors of January

3 stars. Charming! The Ten Thousand Doors of January is about a young woman in the early 1900's who lives in a mansion full of strange artifacts. Her father comes and goes on mysterious missions and she is stuck under the charge of a strict but seemingly supportive caretaker. Until one day, she discovers a door. And a book.

A magical and enchanting story weaves itself beautifully as January makes friends, learns about her past, and runs into trouble. Sure, it's about excitement and adventure and facing misfortune, but it's also about a woman finding herself - loving herself - doubling down on her very sense of self - when everyone else fails. 

If this was a straight up professional-ish review, I'd rate it higher - it's a good book. Well-paced, well-written and it hits certain spots that many readers are nostalgic for after HP and Wayward Children and Narnia. I adore portal fantasies and felt the familiar "man I wish I could find my door" feeling. I also couldn't put it down!

But since this is more of a reaction than a review, I'll call it trope-y, and I'm docking a star, as I always do, for a UDD (Unnecessary Dog Death - even if it's a fake one). The writing comes across as quaint to me, maybe a little cute. I also don't believe in True Love, and sometimes this felt like a romance disguising itself as a fantasy. And the plot contains IMO many impossibilities, which may kind of be the point, but I like writing that solves its problems with a little more finesse. 

Anyway, I do really love the energy here. It's quirky, fun and a great debut.

The Ten Thousand Doors of January on: Amazon | Goodreads